Professor Phardtpounders Colon Cleaner

So every once in a while the 8-year-old in me comes to the fore in my daily life. This week's featured exploration into the inferno is an example of my inner child's appearance into plain sight. I ran across the name of this product and couldn't help myself when I giggled silently and said to myself "I gotta get this. It's hilarious!". Not my proudest moment but I'll say it here for the ridicule of my readers: The name is funny. #sorrynotsorry
Professor Phardtpounders (yes, I know it's not in possessive form. It's like that on the bottle!) Colon Cleaner is the product of Sauce Crafters Inc. This company, operating out of Riviera Beach, FL, began full service sauce production in 1989. They currently produce more than 250 different sauces ranging from mild to super hot. Colon Cleaner is placed in the hot category.
The label is cute in that it is in the form of an old time-type elixir or sham medicine label with a picture of a man with a beard and a mustache (presumably our good professor). It reads "Elixir of Capsaicin Extremus" below the black and white picture of the man. On the side of the bottle the label tells of the contents' reported effects, such as curing the common cold or making an old man remember his wife's name. General good fun.
The color is a deep yellow with fine sediment. Is has a color that one might expect from a mustard-based sauce. The sediment is nice too. The consistency is surprisingly thick and the pour quite slow and controlled. Upon deposition into the vector that brought it to my mouth, it even held it's drop shape somewhat until slowly conforming to the boundaries of the carrier.
The flavor begins with a tangy sweetness that is quickly followed by a savoriness, in part brought about by the inclusion of onion and garlic. A nice mix of spices is present along with the familiar mustard. Finally one draws the taste of the hot peppers but even this taste isn't in the fore but rather appear to accentuate the mustard as an obvious centerpiece.
The heat is present without overpowering one's palate and more importantly, to me at least, without taking away from the inherit flavor of the mixture, as many sauces do. It has an immediate front of the tongue burn that fairly quickly travels to the roof of the mouth. As one might expect, multiple samplings lead to a lip burn. This is not severe and is more of the tingle that I've grown accustomed to in hot sauces. Additionally, not of the bites are particularly long-lasting which, again, doesn't take away from the well-presented flavor profile.
At $8.99 from the Sauce Crafters website this could be considered a must-have for any collector. With it's mid-level yet enjoyable heat and fantastic flavor, I'd recommend this for my readers. Cheers and I'll be back soon with a review!